Complaining Kills Progress…
To be honest, this is a topic that absolutely fires me up. Complaining is one of my biggest pet peeves. Chronic complaining will lead me to lose respect for a person pretty darn quick. I don’t have lot of tolerance for this, because it’s a choice to do so. Regardless of the circumstances, complaining is still a choice. Even when disappointment and inconvenience are at an all time high, complaining can be the last thing we latch onto.
We all know someone who is a chronic complainer. There’s a spirit of complaint that they bring with them in the room. It infiltrates everything and everyone. While I could go on and on complaining about complainers, I do want this to be an insightful discussion, specifically as it relates to our fitness. There’s a lot of science around this topic, so let’s dive in and process this more, so that we can understand the implications of complaining and how to be people who work through life’s challenges and complain less.
Human brains are wired to notice threats first. That survival instinct helped us avoid danger in the past, but today it often shows up as complaining, negative self-talk, and focusing on everything that isn’t going right. If you want fitness results — and a better life — then mastering the internal dialogue you have with yourself is one of the most powerful tools you have.
Surprisingly, what you think and how you think can reshape your outcomes — not just your mood, but your performance, health, resilience, and relationships.
Why Complaining Holds You Back
Complaining might feel like emotional relief in the moment, but it reinforces a problem-focused mindset that magnifies obstacles and undermines confidence. That’s the opposite of what high achievers do.
In contrast, choosing not to complain and reframing experiences in neutral or positive terms helps your brain engage a problem-solving orientation rather than a threat response. This shift matters — especially when you’re pushing through hard workouts or long-term goals where discomfort is part of progress.
Positive self-talk and optimism aren’t about ignoring reality — they’re about focusing on what you can control and improve, even in difficult moments.
What the Research Says About Positive Thinking and Mindset
1. Positive Thinking Builds Resilience and Satisfaction
A randomized controlled trial found that structured positive-thinking training significantly increased resilience and life satisfaction compared to a standard approach focused on weaknesses. Participants who practiced positive thinking showed higher resilience scores and reported greater life satisfaction after the intervention — statistically significant outcomes.
This suggests that intentionally cultivating positive interpretations of events strengthens your ability to bounce back from stress — a key component of sticking with fitness routines and life goals.
2. Optimism Is Linked to Better Health Outcomes
Across dozens of studies bundled into a meta-analysis, researchers found that higher optimism is significantly associated with better physical health outcomes, including lower risk for cardiovascular issues, stronger immune function, and lower mortality risk.
What this means: positivity isn’t just “feel good.” It correlates with measurable improvements in long-term health — outcomes that matter far beyond the gym.
3. Positive Outlook Supports Healthy Behavior Adherence
In a study of patients recovering from a cardiac event, those who reported higher optimism and gratitude were significantly more likely to adhere to healthy behaviors (like exercise, diet, medication, and stress reduction) six months later.
This shows that a positive, forward-looking mindset doesn’t just make you feel better — it supports sticking to the actions that produce better outcomes.
4. Positive Traits Improve Psychological Well-Being
Research shows that positive psychological traits such as optimism, gratitude, and hope are strongly and positively associated with mental well-being and better coping with life stressors.
When you focus less on complaining and more on adaptive thinking, you’re engaging a mindset that actively protects your mental health — especially during difficult challenges.
Not Complaining Translates Beyond Fitness
🏃 Fitness
Hard workouts become growth opportunities, not punishments. You learn to associate challenge with progress, which increases consistency — the #1 predictor of results.
🧠 Mental Health
Positive thinking improves stress management and cognitive flexibility, allowing you to stay calm and solution-oriented rather than overwhelmed by negativity.
💼 Work and Productivity
Professionals who approach challenges with optimism show greater persistence and innovation, pushing through setbacks instead of getting derailed by complaints.
🤝 Relationships
People who focus on solutions and strengths are more helpful, supportive, and easier to collaborate with — qualities that foster trust and deeper bonds.
Practical Tools to Reduce Complaining and Strengthen Mindset
Here are simple strategies that make a real difference:
🔁 Reframe the Narrative
When you notice a complaint forming, ask:
“What lesson is here? What can I control?”
This turns a negative thought into a paired learning opportunity.
📊 Track Positive Self-Talk
Keep a small journal; write down:
One negative thought you caught and
How you rephrased it positively.
This reinforces awareness and builds momentum.
🙏 Practice Gratitude
Even short gratitude lists (e.g., 3 things per day) are linked with increased optimism, enthusiasm, and motivation — and even more time spent exercising and fewer symptoms of illness in some studies.
🧠 Visualization and Affirmations
Athletes who engage in structured visualization and positive self-talk can improve performance by ~10–20% compared to less optimistic peers.
Actionable 7-Day No Complaining Challenge
Try this simple challenge to start restructuring your internal dialogue:
Day 1: Catch the First Complaint
Notice one complaint in the day — then reframe it.
Write both versions down.
Day 2: Replace With Gratitude
For every complaint you catch, list two things you’re grateful for.
Day 3: Reframe Immediately
Set a rule: no complaint goes un-reframed.
(“This is too hard” → “This makes me stronger.”)
Day 4: Speak in Solutions
If a complaint arises, immediately ask:
“What step can I take right now?”
Day 5: Intentional Warmup
Before workouts (or tough tasks), say:
“Today’s challenge will help me grow...”
Day 6: Celebrate Resilience
At the end of the day, write one moment you persevered through without complaining.
Day 7: Reflect and Build
Review the week — notice how your energy and mindset have shifted.
Commit to continuing these practices next week.
Strength Starts in the Mind
Not complaining isn’t about pretending challenges don’t exist — it’s about engaging with them constructively. A more positive mindset doesn’t guarantee an easy life, but it does equip you to handle difficulties with resilience, confidence, and purpose. And that’s the mindset that builds lasting fitness, meaningful relationships, and a life where you grow through the hard things — not get stuck in them.
As a Christian, there’s an even higher calling towards my thought life. Philippians 4:8 says, “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”
Regardless of your beliefs, we can all agree that focusing on the negative doesn’t lead to much good at all. The invitation is to not live life like a fairy tale, pretending that no problems exist, but rather choosing to be grateful and see how the challenge of our daily lives leads to growth.
-Coach Tanner