Let Your Yes Be Yes and Your No Be No

Sep 4

Here’s one of the best ways to find success in your fitness journey: let your yes be yes and your no be no.

If you said you’d work out today—you do it.
If you committed to eating clean—you stick to it.
If you promised yourself to cut out soda, fast food, or late-night snacking—you honor that choice.
If you said you’d stop binge watching tv late at night and get to bed earlier—you make the tough decision to follow through.
If you said you’d stop drinking alcohol or smoking weed—Actually give it up! Don’t dabble back and forth.

At its core, this principle is about integrity. It’s about aligning your actions with your words and proving to yourself that you can be trusted. And in today’s world, where breaking promises (even to ourselves) has become normal, this skill is rare—but invaluable.

Why Keeping Your Word Matters in Fitness

When you break small commitments, you chip away at self-trust. Over time, this creates a pattern where excuses feel natural and discipline feels impossible. On the flip side, when you keep your promises—especially the small ones—you reinforce that you’re capable of following through.

This isn’t just motivational talk—it’s psychology. Research on self-determination theory shows that autonomy (choosing and sticking to commitments), competence (proving to yourself you can do it), and relatedness (support from others) are key drivers of motivation and well-being (Deci & Ryan, 2000). Honoring your word builds both autonomy and competence.

In today’s world, commitment is almost treated as optional. Plans change. Promises are broken. Goals get postponed until “tomorrow.” But if you want to build a strong body and a strong mind, there’s one principle that will take you further than any workout routine or nutrition plan: let your yes be yes and your no be no.

That means honoring your word. If you said you’d hit the gym today, then you go. If you committed to eating healthy meals this week, then you do. If you promised yourself to avoid soda, alcohol, late-night snacking, or whatever else doesn’t serve your goals—then you follow through.

Fitness Is About More Than Motivation

Anyone can download a workout plan or meal guide. The hard part is showing up— when you’re tired, when the couch feels more inviting than the gym, when you’re stressed with work, family, etc but you told yourself you’d do it. Motivation constantly rises and falls based on our circumstances. If the only thing keeping you going is your motivation, you’re doomed to fail.

Honestly, I’ve been coaching for 15 years now, and I still can’t stand when I hear clients or potential clients say, “I’m struggling with motivation”. As if everyone who practices discipline and makes sacrifices to be healthy is always “motivated”. Absolutely not! Throughout the year, I find myself having little to no desire to workout. Usually I do enjoy it and I’m always glad when I do. But there are definitely times when I don’t want to, but I still do it. This is also the case for eating food, practicing healthy alcohol consumption, sleep hygiene, etc…

Motivation is a terrible driver for success. It comes and goes quickly, and it leaves you frustrated, often. Rather than making decisions about your future health based on how you feel in the moment, think about the type of qualities that healthy people possess. Healthy people: eat good, exercise often, manage their stress, aren’t consumed by substances, get good sleep, cope with stress through healthy outlets, have stable relationships and routines, and don’t let their mental or emotional health take them to extreme lows or highs. They are steady. If you want to be healthy, do what healthy people do.

Do what healthy people do. Model the behaviors and traits that you respect most, and do your best to do them for a very long time. This isn’t about being excellent once in a while. It’s about being good most of the time. Anyone can have a singular moment of greatness. But rather than seeing that one moment as the thing to chase, chase consistent good behaviors and disciplines and you’ll be pleasantly surprised at how good of results you get.

Now let’s get practical. Here are several ways to take this from talk to action!

How to Practice This Daily

Keep Commitments Small and Clear – Don’t overpromise. If you say you’ll work out three times a week, do that. Build consistency before adding more.
Decide Once – If you said “no” to junk food for the next 30 days, then you don’t renegotiate at 10 p.m. in front of the fridge. The decision was already made.
Write It Down – A written commitment carries more weight than a thought in your head. Post it somewhere you see daily.
Share Your Goals With Others – Invite friends, family, co-workers, a coach/mentor, or anyone you trust into your goals. By telling others, you become accountable to what you said, and they’ll likely ask about it, keeping you focused and on track.
Celebrate Kept Promises – Every time you follow through, acknowledge it. You’re proving to yourself that your word matters.

Psychological Hacks to Help You Follow Through

Even with the best intentions, it’s easy to slip. Here are science-backed strategies to help your “yes” stay yes, and your “no” stay no:

1. Make Commitments Specific and Visible

Instead of “I’ll work out more,” say, “I’ll work out Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 7 a.m.” Studies show that implementation intentions (clear when-where-how plans) significantly increase the likelihood of follow-through (Gollwitzer, 1999). Write it down and put it where you’ll see it.

2. Use Pre-Commitment Devices

Want to cut out junk food? Don’t keep it in the house. Want to make sure you work out? Lay your clothes out the night before. This idea comes from behavioral economics: when you remove options that lead to failure, you make the path of least resistance the one that helps you win (Thaler & Sunstein, 2008).

3. Stack Habits

Pair your commitment with something you already do. For example: “After I brush my teeth in the morning, I’ll do 20 pushups.” Habit stacking uses existing routines as anchors to build new ones (Clear, 2018).

4. Set Up Accountability

We’re less likely to break commitments when others are involved. Research on social accountability shows people stick to their goals more when progress is shared with friends or support groups (Harkin et al., 2016). Post your workout streak or share your meals with a friend who’s on a similar journey.

5. Visualize the Identity, Not Just the Outcome

Don’t just say, “I want to lose 20 pounds.” Say, “I’m the kind of person who honors my word.” When you tie your actions to identity, you’re far more likely to stay consistent (Oyserman, 2009).

Honoring Your Word = Building Self-Respect

Every time you follow through on a commitment, you build trust with yourself. And when you can trust yourself, you stop needing external motivation. Your word becomes enough.

In a world where canceling plans and breaking promises has become common, choosing to let your yes be yes and your no be no is a radical act. It’s also one of the most powerful fitness tools you’ll ever have—not just for your body, but for your mind and character.

So the next time you make a commitment—whether it’s getting out of the house to go workout, passing on dessert, or saying no to what doesn’t serve you—remember: you’re not just working on fitness. You’re working on integrity.

There’s a well known bible verse that this idea stems from. James 5:12 states, “But above all, my brothers, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or by any other oath, but let your “yes” be yes and your “no” be no, so that you may not fall under condemnation.”

This is an invitation into greater integrity. To actually do what you said you would do. Stand out in a broken and flaky world! Aren’t you tired of flaky and dodgy people? They say one thing, and do another. From politics to social gatherings, this is all too common. Don’t you want better? I’m sure you do! But it starts within you. Making small commitments and honoring them. Don’t blame others for their lack of follow through. YOU start doing it in your own life. Take ownership over all of the little things that you compromise. I’m guilty of it. We all are.

Until next time…

-Coach Tanner

References

Clear, J. (2018). Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones. Avery.
Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (2000). Self-determination theory and the facilitation of intrinsic motivation, social development, and well-being. American Psychologist, 55(1), 68–78.
Gollwitzer, P. M. (1999). Implementation intentions: Strong effects of simple plans. American Psychologist, 54(7), 493–503.
Harkin, B., Webb, T. L., Chang, B. P., et al. (2016). Does monitoring goal progress promote goal attainment? Psychological Bulletin, 142(2), 198–229.
Oyserman, D. (2009). Identity-based motivation: Implications for action-readiness, procedural-readiness, and consumer behavior. Journal of Consumer Psychology, 19(3), 250–260.
Thaler, R. H., & Sunstein, C. R. (2008). Nudge: Improving Decisions About Health, Wealth, and Happiness. Yale University Press.

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